It's Like Christmas All Over Again!

So says my five-year old, who has been "celebrating" Christmas for three months now. He takes random toys from around the house (believe me, there is plenty to choose from, I swear the stuff is breeding) and "wraps" them in one of Dad's boots (for a stocking, don't you know?) or in one of my dish towels.

Then he "gives" them to his brother or sister or me. By "give" I mean, he says it is for you, then proceeds to unwrap it himself and tell you all about it, but don't you dare actually try to take the toy and play with it!

I finally got so tired of him carrying around his father's boots (of questionable cleanliness) that I went out to the garage and gave him his actual stocking.

Although, I have to admit, think about how much better off our finances would be if I could just wrap up any old thing around the house in a dishtowel and give it to someone as their present - especially if I get to then take it back, wrap it up again, and give it to someone else!

Somehow I think if I tried that at his next birthday, it wouldn't fly.


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My Knockers and My Virus

There's a title for you!

First off, I've been sick. Really really ill with a head cold/virus/nasty bug thingy. I don't think I've been this sick for this long in over 10 years.

I haven't been able to taste anything or smell anything in days. My husband picked our daughter up the other day and said, "Whew, she STINKS!" She had just been crawling all over me and had been pooping the whole time. I walked right up and took a big ol' whiff of her diaper with my nose pressed against her fleece-covered bum. Nothing. I couldn't smell even a hint of poo! Which is nice (and I got saddled with changing her as a result, not so nice) but it also means I have to visually check her diaper every 1/2 hour to make sure she hasn't pooped. Oh, it's been fun, let me tell ya!

On the plus side, since I also can't taste anything, my appetite has been fairly nil. So I've lost nearly 10 pounds already. I force myself to eat some toast in the morning and then usually have some soup for dinner. I have been snacking on a few Ruffles potato chips since they feel good and scratchy on my throat and I can almost taste the saltiness, but I can still only eat a few. You know you are sick when you don't even have an appetite for potato chips!

Anyway, want to hear about my knockers? I thought so!

My three year old has been obsessed with his Diego adventurer/explorer kit lately. He is probably at least six months to a year behind his peers verbally, so sometimes it is hard to understand what he is saying as he is yammering intently to you. I kept hearing him in the other room saying "knockers." Since I was pretty sure he hadn't sneaked a copy of Playboy magazine into the house, I went to investigate.

He was leaning against the back of the couch looking intently out the window through his yellow Diego binoculars. He turns and holds them out to me.

"Look, Mom! My knockers!"

Kids Are Funny!

So the baby and our five-year-old had been playing upstairs. I'm not overly worried as I hear lots of baby giggles and no loud thumps.

Until later, when I realized that the baby's hair is gooey and she smells like lavender.

"Isaac," I call. "What did you do to Miri?"

"Nothing!" he calls back.

My husband, in a moment of sweet genius, takes a different tack.

"Isaac, come here. Why is Miri's head sticky? Did you put something on her head?"

"Dad," he says, matter-of-factly. "I was babytizing* her!"


Of cooooourse! It all makes perfect sense now! We can't have Miri crawling around without being babytized! Heavens, no!!

I just have to say that as often as my kids drive me nutso, they also make me laugh on a daily basis! :)

*Babytizing apparently means anointing her head with baby wash found on her changing table. At least he didn't use the butt cream.

Reason #683 Why I Love 4 Year Olds.

My son cracks me up.

We "encourage" him to eat food (he is a little bird eater who will sometimes take maybe three bites of a meal all day long, yet want to snack constantly) by telling him that eating healthy will help him grow tall or grow as strong as Daddy.

So yesterday he ate all his Mac'n'Cheese (I know, big sacrifice, right?) and he gets down and runs around the table to me and points to his toes.

"Look how tall I've grown Mom!"

As though the distance from his eyes to his toes had increased significantly! LOL - Yup, those toes sure look farther away, he must have grown taller!