NOTE: This Post Contains Poop.

Ok, so don't say I didn't warn you!

I am currently trying to poop toilet train our 3 year old. In fact, he will be four in September, and I need to get him trained before he starts preschool end of August.

We have tried:
1. letting him run around naked (he pooped on the floor and then played in it)
2. giving him rewards like m&ms.
3. Promising a big reward, such as a train for his Thomas the Tank Engine collection.
4. Taking away one of his current trains every time he poops his pants.
5. Making him sit on the potty till he poops (he just won't do it.)
6. Spanking him when he poops his pants (this was a last resort and, just like the experts said, only induced him to hold it longer and constipate himself silly).

We have had a few successes, but these are always followed by unmitigated disasters, such as yesterday when he pooped in his swim trunks. UGH! Cleaning poop out of mesh is NOT FUN. And that is a vast understatement.

Anyway, I have had a few emotional breakdowns along the way. The last one was Monday when I called my husband at work and left a hysterical sobbing message that after 7 poop incidents (not to mention our youngest's three poopy diapers) I just couldn't take the poop anymore and wanted to get a job and let someone else raise our kids for awhile.

Needless to say, I am still here and have yet to turn in one application. lol

My inate laziness kicked in and I realized that as hard as it is being a mom and raising two little boys, having a "real" job would mean getting dressed up, doing my hair, and wearing makeup. No thanks!

Plus it would mean someone else would be witnessing the moments when my boys make it all worth it - like the oldest walking up and giving his brother a hug and a kiss for no apparent reason! Or the youngest crawling into my lap and selflessly offering me a sip of his room-temperature chocolate milk he's been nursing all morning.

Ok, enough rambling. I do think my oldest looks like he needs to poop . . .